Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Friends are friends forever

Does anyone else remember that song? I know I do. They used to play on the last night of camp when i was a kid and everyone would cry. It just sort of popped into my head...
Of course it makes sense why. I certainly have been missing my friends a hell of a lot lately. I don't necessarily miss being in college, but i miss the atmosphere and the freedom that I felt back then. Now everything is about money and bills and when we have to be where. I miss the days of just drifting, not sure where we would end up, but happy to be traveling together. I guess in a way I am still drifting.
I mean, here I am, living in North Carolina, with my amazing boyfriend, working at a job that is not exactly overflowing my creative soul and having no idea what the next year will bring. I know another move back home, while J is in the lovely warm and sandy beaches of Iraq, but other than that... no clue!
And now suddenly, that same part of me who cherished having no plans and no "for sures" is drowning in this see of uncertainty. I find myself craving stability. Craving consistency. And yet, still wishing I could be around others who bring out my spontaneous nature that I have always embraced and cherished. I find it so hard to wrap my brain around that we (my friends) are each of us in our own little world, completely removed from one another. And we are all living these adult lives. Everyone is working and making money to pay their bills. We are all trying to survive in this world and the thing that feeds our souls the most is each other. And sometimes isn't the soul more important than our water or electric bill? I guess a soul running on empty doesn't seems as bad as a sweltering apartment in mid July!
And things here in NC are great. I love Josh more than I can express on here, but even still, I miss my friends and their companionship that they provide me. I am thankful that I have someone in my life that is more than just a lover, but is always a friend and that makes all the difference. He cheers me to no end, and I am sure I don't tell him enough.
The ones I love are always on my mind and I think of them often. My family I miss so much I can't even express it. And my friends who have filled me with such wonderful memories, I have to archive them and recall them whenever times are rougher than I'd like. And of course Joshua. These are the things that make me smile.
These are the things warm my soul...
If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk forever in my garden.
posted by Kellie @ 10:59 AM |


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