Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Bree and Me

Sometimes when I am bored I go online and take quizzes... You know the kind- "What’s Your Personality Profile", "What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?!", "Which Desperate Housewife Are You?." I’ve taken that last quiz multiple times- and different versions of it. One might wonder why so much effort is being put into finding out which fictional character from television I am most like. I guess it’s because the answer always surprises me.

I am... Bree.

When I first sat down to take said "test" I scoffed. I am SO Susan. Romantic, clumsy, always finding herself in a mess but trying her best to make ever day- that’s me. I knew the results before I hit "Next" to reveal my true nature. I was wrong. Fluke, I thought to myself, deciding at that moment to take the test over again- perhaps I hit the wrong button- maybe I skipped a page- maybe the test just spouts out different results each time- who knows, but I was determined to see Susan’s face pop up on my screen. Time after time, I saw Bree’s firey red hair and perfectly put together ensemble. I moved on to a new test where, again, my results were with Bree. This sparked me thinking...

I guess I am a lot like Bree. I project a persona of a woman who is completely in control of both herself and others (only you, my dear blogging buddies know the truth!). I am always polite, and I am mortified when those around me or not. I expect to be treated with the respect I show to others. I hate rude service/cashiers/servers/customer relations of any kind. I am attentive, even when I could care less, purely because it’s appropriate to be so. I take great comfort in the rules that govern our behaviors and the formalities that go along with them. I’m a great hostess- I enjoy cooking, and at times, I actually can enjoy cleaning (when I have the time to do a good job). I’m great at holding it together- to the point where others have misinterpreted this strength as uncaring (which couldn’t be further than the truth- I just don’t like people to see me cry).

After realizing all of these similarities, I was pretty distraught. Is this how I want to be perceived? This "bull in a china shop" reputation I have carried with me through the years- is that really who I am, or is it the person I want to the world to see? Which, again, brings me back to Bree. But I then I realized something else... Even with all of these qualities that some might deem as "fake" I am still the same girl who took a shower in the rain. I’m the girl who cries to herself when certain songs play on the radio- even sometimes when, *gulp*, people are around! I’m adventurous and enthusiastic- even when I don’t want to be- and by the end, I usually end up having the time of my life. I’m Most Likely to Be Famous and Most Likely to Succeed. I love with all of my heart and can debate for hours on the issues I am most passionate about (and trust me, there are tons).

The truth is, I am not one hundred percent anyone but me. And that has to be okay, because there’s nothing I can do to change it.

And, moreover, I like who I am- the Bree-part and all.
posted by Kellie @ 8:34 AM |

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